{"id":2370,"date":"2020-06-17T08:34:06","date_gmt":"2020-06-17T07:34:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/?p=2370"},"modified":"2023-09-18T17:51:47","modified_gmt":"2023-09-18T16:51:47","slug":"how-to-improve-relationships-during-lockdown","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/how-to-improve-relationships-during-lockdown\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Improve Relationships During Lockdown"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Leonora Brooker Relationship Video\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/9fDcusvZaTo?start=7&#038;feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<div class=\"_2cuy _3dgx _2vxa\">How is your relationship coping under isolation? Being with your partner all day every day is not something a relationship is normally built upon, so you may find you are struggling to adjust.<\/div>\n<div class=\"_2cuy _3dgx _2vxa\">The Coronavirus has forced us to deal with life-changing and impactful events like never before. Given the stress and anxiety we have been put under during the Covid pandemic, it\u2019s not really surprising that it may have taken a toll on your relationship. Particularly if you have children to home school or entertain as well. Friction can easily build and little things can become overwhelming.<\/div>\n<div class=\"_2cuy _3dgx _2vxa\">That doesn\u2019t mean that you are helpless to do anything about it. In fact many couples report that they have become closer during this period.<\/div>\n<div class=\"_2cuy _3dgx _2vxa\">As we don\u2019t know how long this situation will last, it\u2019s worth taking some steps to ensure we get through this with our relationships intact. Aiming to come out the other side stronger than ever before!<\/div>\n<div class=\"_2cuy _3dgx _2vxa\">Here are some strategies that are worth implementing to get you started:<\/div>\n<h3 class=\"_2cuy _50a1 _2vxa\"><span class=\"_4yxo\">Re-connect the love you have with each other by following these simple tips.<\/span><\/h3>\n<ul class=\"_5a_q _5yj1\" dir=\"ltr\">\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\">Our brains are wired for negativity especially, in stressful situations. So during this time of isolation, you may be noticing every single thing that your partner is doing that irritates you &#8211; leaving a cup in the sink, talking too loud on the phone, watching too much TV. It can lead to explosive exchanges and needless arguments.<\/li>\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\">Instead, write a list of the <span class=\"_4yxo\">positive<\/span> differences between you. Your individual <span class=\"_4yxo\">qualities<\/span> and <span class=\"_4yxo\">strengths<\/span>, both practical and emotional. This can help you begin to <span class=\"_4yxo\">appreciate each other <\/span>again and recognise the fact that <span class=\"_4yxo\">you both<\/span> bring things of<span class=\"_4yxo\"> value<\/span> to <span class=\"_4yxo\">the relationship.<\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\">Rewire your brains to notice the<span class=\"_4yxo\"> good things<\/span> rather than just the bad things. Really make it a <span class=\"_4yxo\">priority to look for the positives<\/span> throughout your day. Every time your partner does something nice &#8211; or even just something that isn\u2019t annoying &#8211; take notice. <span class=\"_4yxo\">Say thank you<\/span> to each other for the little things. <span class=\"_4yxo\">Pay each other compliments<\/span>, they go a long way to making us<span class=\"_4yxo\"> feel valued and secure<\/span>. These little things will help train your brain to seek out the positive.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3 class=\"_2cuy _50a1 _2vxa\"><span class=\"_4yxo\">Avoid Criticisms and Put Downs<\/span><\/h3>\n<ul class=\"_5a_q _5yj1\" dir=\"ltr\">\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\"><span class=\"_4yxo\">Criticizing<\/span> your partner <span class=\"_4yxo\">implies<\/span> that you think there is <span class=\"_4yxo\">something wrong with them.<\/span> Saying things like<span class=\"_4yxo\"> \u2018You never\u2019<\/span> or <span class=\"_4yxo\">\u2018You always\u2019<\/span> is like a<span class=\"_4yxo\"> global attack.<\/span> <span class=\"_4yxo\">Put<\/span> <span class=\"_4yxo\">downs<\/span> can <span class=\"_4yxo\">become<\/span> extremely <span class=\"_4yxo\">vicious <\/span>and very <span class=\"_4yxo\">personal<\/span>, which leads to <span class=\"_4yxo\">hurt feelings<\/span> that are<span class=\"_4yxo\"> difficult to shake off.<\/span> It is much better to make a calm, clear but direct complaint about the <span class=\"_4yxo\">specific<\/span> matter in hand. Try to explain why it\u2019s important to you and how much you would appreciate them doing it differently.<\/li>\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\">Most <span class=\"_4yxo\">people<\/span> <span class=\"_4yxo\">defend<\/span> <span class=\"_4yxo\">themselves<\/span> when they<span class=\"_4yxo\"> feel<\/span> that they are being <span class=\"_4yxo\">attacked<\/span> and this can escalate the scale of the disagreement. Instead, listen to the complaint and <span class=\"_4yxo\">accept<\/span> <span class=\"_4yxo\">some shared responsibility<\/span> for it and try to <span class=\"_4yxo\">see it from the other\u2019s point of view.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3 class=\"_2cuy _50a1 _2vxa\"><span class=\"_4yxo\">Keep the Lines of Communication Open<\/span><\/h3>\n<ul class=\"_5a_q _5yj1\" dir=\"ltr\">\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\">Always set some time aside to <span class=\"_4yxo\">check in with each other. <\/span> Ask your partner how they\u2019re feeling or what there biggest concerns are. It <span class=\"_4yxo\">shows<\/span> that <span class=\"_4yxo\">you care<\/span> and <span class=\"_4yxo\">that you are in this together<\/span> and gives them the opportunity to talk if they choose to.<\/li>\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\">Make a conscious decision to <span class=\"_4yxo\">really listen<\/span> to what they have to say and understand that <span class=\"_4yxo\">not everything requires a solution or an answer<\/span>. In fact sometimes it isn\u2019t possible. <span class=\"_4yxo\">A hug and some reassuring words<\/span> can go a long way in these instances.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3 class=\"_2cuy _50a1 _2vxa\"><span class=\"_4yxo\">Do Stuff that Makes you Feel Good<\/span><\/h3>\n<ul class=\"_5a_q _5yj1\" dir=\"ltr\">\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\">Stress, anxiety and negativity are contagious and can send you both into a downward spiral.<\/li>\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\"><span class=\"_4yxo\">Schedule some fun time every day.<\/span> Make an appointment to do something that makes you laugh or that is uplifting every day. Get a board game out &#8211; make a silly video to send to friends &#8211; learn some new dance moves from You Tube &#8211; anything at all that makes you feel good. Doing something enjoyable together triggers the release of feel-good neuro- hormones and enhances bonding.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3 class=\"_2cuy _50a1 _2vxa\"><span class=\"_4yxo\">Introduce More Humour<\/span><\/h3>\n<ul class=\"_5a_q _5yj1\" dir=\"ltr\">\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\">Humour in our neurology has the ability to cancel out anxiety, stress, anger in a millisecond, so use this to break the tension.<\/li>\n<li class=\"_2cuy _509q _2vxa\">Turn irritating comments or behaviors into humour &#8211; NOT SARCASM &#8211; see the situation as a cartoon or say\/do something silly that allows you both to laugh at it.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; How is your relationship coping under isolation? Being with your partner all day every day is not something a relationship is normally built upon, so you may find you are struggling to adjust. The Coronavirus has forced us to deal with life-changing and impactful events like never before. Given the stress and anxiety we [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":2328,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[7,6],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2370"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2370"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2370\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2423,"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2370\/revisions\/2423"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2328"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2370"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2370"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.minddesigns.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2370"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}